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i was in rehab for a loratab addiction and xanax addiction i am a benige drinker i am not trying to get attention at all so sorry you feel that way abomb
Byron, I would like to be straight forward with you. It is time that you grow up and be a man. How do you go about doing that? Well you need to take this in steps. Dont try to fix everything at one time.
First off you need to show your wife a little more respect. I don't care how bad the rest of your life gets she doesn't deserve to have you stay out until 5 in the morning. I dont care for what reason. Look back on it now and you'll see that that only compounded the problem.
Next you need to look at the underlying cause in all of your problems. From an outsider looking in it appears as if alcohol is at the root. If that is the case you need to remove yourself completely from any influence alcohol may have. That means no occasional drink, that means no bartending, that means no night clubs, etc. Any where alcohol is you need to stay away from.
Then you need to tackle the problems that have occured recently (DUI). Do whatever you need to do to get that behind you. Pay what you need to pay and if you don't have the money get another job to supplement your income.
Finally, and most importantly is you need to find a good church home. Right now you dont know it but you have a desire to worship. We were created that way. It appears as if you are worshipping alcohol or substances. That is NOT how we were created. God created us with the desire to worship and gain our self worth from him and with you running to alcohol is like trying to put a square peg in a round hole...its not going to work.
This I can tell you from experience. I dont tell everyone this but I am putting myself out there to show you how emphatic I am about that last point. I went to prison for more than 2 years for trafficing. Up to that point my square peg I was trying to fit into that round hole was money. Well the Lord decided to take all that away from me to where all I had was him. I decided that I was going to take that time to decide what God had in mind for me. So I focused on him by going to church and reading the Bible daily. Although I was sick at my stomach everyday from being away from my girlfriend (my wife now) and my young daughter I had this happiness and peace that surpasses all understanding. It made no sense then but I look back and that was all God that carried me through that. I was surounded by murders, rapists, petty theives, and whoever else but I was happy.
Believe me when I say that if God is trying to get your attention He will stop at nothing to get you to be the person he wants you to be. Don't make him take everything from you like He had to do me before you figure this out.
Just a little side note. Now I am happily married with two wonderful children. I am now working on a land development project and am the President of the HOA. I live in a $500k house in an upscale part of the city. I said all of that to say that if you are walking in the will of God He will take care of you. I am a felon for goodness sakes. I am not supposed to amount to anything right?
man, i don't have insurance, if u really want it, get "catastrophic health" it's only 60 bucks a month, covers u for stuff over 25k
cobra is the most expensive, 3x's what u can get
u should get full coverage for 125 a month from uni-care or blue cross, ur young, no prev conditions, u don't smoke, and u work out and not overweight, ur there best customer
i'm not licesensed to diagnose ****, yet if u want, pm and we can talk
granted i don't know u, yet, it's not like u are a bum and refuse too do **** too help ur self, rip people off, screw others
most of ur stuff hurts u, and those close too u
is there a history of depression or manic depression in ur family, a history of attention deficit disorder????
i'm out most of day moving, i'll answer tommorrow
oh fwiw, why am i positive, cause when u have unmovable boundaries, u seem to do well too okay, ie, the new job, yet left on your own u push boundaries too extremes, too ur own demise, sometimes this could be **** u started in childhood and just brought into adulthood, cause u could, like rich kids w money who mess up, why, cause they can, no consequences, no pain
people change when pain is the greatest
don't forget, u are a smart guy, funny, caring, and u do try hard and very hard at times
look at it this way, if u weren't here and we all weren't here too support, who knows where u would be
THE REASON WE SPLIT UP IS BECAUSE OF ME I DIDN'T CALL OR COME HOME TILL 5 IN THE MORNING A COUPLE WEEKS AGO I JUST HAD QUIT MY JOB, BEEN FIGHTING AN ADDICTION PROBLEM, BEEN UNHAPPY WITH MYSELF AND WITH MY MARRIAGE. ME AS A PERSON I NEVER USED TO BE THIS WAY. WE WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF FINDING OUT IF I AM MANIC DEPESSIVE BUT I LOST MY HEALTH INSURANCE AND I AM IN THE PROCESS OF GETTING COBRA ITS JUST REALLY EXPENSIVE. I AM REALLY LOOKING AT BECOMING A POLICE OFFICER IN THE FUTURE. I HAVE TO HANDLE THE DUI THING FIRST I HAVE 2500 IN CASH SET BACK TO PAY TO MAKE THIS THING GO AWAY I HOPE ITS ENOUGH SINCE ITS MY FIRST. I AM BARTENDING AND SERVING RIGHT NOW. NO I CAN NOT DRINK ON THE JOB.
Why did you blow?! 3 beers...you coulda did his little monkey show field test blind folded,..better yet, never even field test,.. refuse to blow because "you know that those breathalizers are inacurate.", got your attorney, and got it reduced to careless driving, but drink & drive=bad...Anyway, hindsight...Gotta grab the future by the balls and take control of it. Clear your mind, make sound decisions for the better in every aspect. You know what you gotta do. Listen to your instincts...you know what you have to do.
You need to stop drinking first, and then you need to decide if you want to save your marriage. Think hard about what you want and then make a decision and head in that direction. Does sound like you need to grow up. You sound down on yourself, and you shouldn't be, please don't do anything to yourself. I doubt you are having suicidal thoughts, but I don't want you to get to that point. All that does is end your life and cause pain and turmoil in many others. Please seek help if it gets that far.
Why did you blow?! 3 beers...you coulda did his little monkey show field test blind folded,..better yet, never even field test,.. refuse to blow because "you know that those breathalizers are inacurate.", got your attorney, and got it reduced to careless driving, but drink & drive=bad...
You have alot of great advice in this thread.
All depends on if your state has implied consent. A first offense DUI in my state results in losing your license for 6 months, but refusing to submit to a field sobriety test results in loss of your license for a year, even if you aren't convicted of anything. Many times a first offense is dropped to a lesser charge and you just do the DUI penalties, but you don't have the DUI on your record.
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