TweetNice! Sounds kind of like my hero George Carlin.
TweetWhy is marijuana not legal? It's a natural plant that grows in the dirt. Do you know what's not natural? 80 year old dudes with hard-ons. That's not natural. But we got pills for that. We're dedicating all our medical resources to keeping the old guys erect, but we're putting people in jail for something that grows in the dirt?
You know we have more prescription drugs now. Every commercial that comes on TV is a prescription drug ad. I can't watch TV for four minutes without thinking I have five serious diseases. Like: "Do you ever wake up tired in the morning?" Oh my god I have this, write this down. Whatever it is, I have it. Half the time I don't even know what the commercial is: people running in fields or flying kites or swimming in the ocean. I'm like that is the greatest disease ever. How do you get that? That disease comes with a hot chick and a puppy.
The schools now: It is all about self-esteem in the schools now. Build the kids' self-esteem, make them feel good about themselves. If everybody grows up with high self-esteem, who is going to dance in our strip clubs? What's going to happen to our porno industry? These women don't just grow on trees. It takes lots of drunk dads missing dance recitals before you decide to blow a goat on the internet for fifty bucks. And if that disappears, where does that leave me on a Friday night with my new high speed connection?
Masterminds are another word that comes up all the time. You keep hearing about these terrorist masterminds that get killed in the middle east. Terrorists masterminds. Mastermind is sort of a lofty way to describe what these guys do, don't you think? They're not masterminds. "OK, you take bomb, right? And you put in your backpack. And you get on bus and you blow yourself up. Alright?" "Why do I have to blow myself up? Why can't I just:" "Who's the ****ing mastermind here? Me or you?"
Americans, let's face it: We've been a spoiled country for a long time. Do you know what the number one health risk in America is? Obesity. They say we're in the middle of an obesity epidemic. An epidemic like it is polio. Like we'll be telling our grand kids about it one day. The Great Obesity Epidemic of 2004. "How'd you get through it grandpa?" "Oh, it was horrible Johnny, there was cheesecake and pork chops everywhere."
Nobody knows why were getting fatter? Look at our lifestyle. I'll sit at a drive thru. I'll sit there behind fifteen other cars instead of getting up to make the eight foot walk to the totally empty counter. Everything is mega meal, super sized. Want biggie fries, super sized, want to go large. You want to have thirty burgers for a nickel you fat mother ****er. There's room in the back. Take it! Want a 55 gallon drum of Coke with that? It's only three more cents.
Sometimes you have to suffer a little bit in your youth to motivate yourself to succeed in later life. Do you think if Bill Gates got laid in high school, do you think there'd be a Microsoft? Of course not. You got to spend a long time in your own locker with your underwear shoved up your ass before you start to think, "You'll see. I'm going to take over the world of computers! I'll show them."
We're in one of the richest countries in the world, but the minimum wage is lower than it was thirty five years ago. There are homeless people everywhere. This homeless guy asked me for money the other day. I was about to give it to him and then I thought he's going to use it on drugs or alcohol. And then I thought, that's what I'm going to use it on. Why am I judging this poor bastard. People love to judge homeless guys. Like if you give them money they're just going to waste it. Well, he lives in a box, what do you want him to do? Save it up and buy a wall unit? Take a little run to the store for a throw rug and a CD rack? He's homeless. I walked behind this guy the other day. A homeless guy asked him for money. He looks right at the homeless guy and says why don't you go get a job you bum. People always say that to homeless guys like it is so easy. This homeless guy was wearing his underwear outside his pants. Outside his pants. I'm guessing his resume isn't all up to date. I'm predicting some problems during the interview process. I'm pretty sure even McDonalds has a "underwear goes inside the pants" policy. Not that they enforce it really strictly, but technically I'm sure it is on the books... people these days.
I didnt write this but i found it amusing
TweetNice! Sounds kind of like my hero George Carlin.
Goals for December 2007:
Elite 1825 lb Total @220, trim down a bit in the mean time, too.
TweetI could go on and on about this subject as well.... Legalize it already, or ATLEAST decriminalze it in the US...cause what is going on now SURE aint working!!
Tweetnot to crap the thread, but someone send me a PM for testing please.......
TweetThat writing is soooo true...but as far as the homeless goes....some of them have more money than God! ha!
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"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."
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Aerobics: a series of strenuous exercises which help convert fats, sugars, and starch into aches, pains and cramps! (that's why I don't do 'em LOL)
TweetLOLOLOL
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"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."
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Aerobics: a series of strenuous exercises which help convert fats, sugars, and starch into aches, pains and cramps! (that's why I don't do 'em LOL)
TweetI agree it's a joke,.I know more people addicted to perscription meds and alchohol. but thats fine cause it's legal and it doesn't lead to harder stuff,..like smoking bud or huffing paint. A friend of mine is homeless and living in a tool shed for three lil shriveled plants...The Lincoln County Interagency Narcotics Team, aka; L.I.N.T tore through his house to find the "killer weed". broke open his moms urn, and dug through her f'ing ashes just to get enough of the "killer weed" to produce an ounce which would be a class three felony and a $100,000.00 bond. He's just a disabled vet loner..kindest guy in the world, who would rather puff a lil bud rather than eat a bunch of pills that make him sick. Im in the process of renewing my medical marijuana card.
Leaders did what others weren't willing to do, now they enjoy the things that others do not.
Terra Explorations
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