The Genealogy of Mr. Jack Schitt
The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for
a response when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt."
Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the
only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the
fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep
N. Schitt Inc.
They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe
Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6
children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull
Schitt, and the twins: Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parent's objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb
Schitt, a high school drop out. However, after being married
15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later
remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were living with
them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known
as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a
son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two other of the
6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable
throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the
newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The
Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride,
Pisa Schitt. So now when someone says, "You don't know Jack
Schitt", you can correct them.
The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for
a response when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt."
Now you can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the
only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the
fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep
N. Schitt Inc.
They had one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe
Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6
children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull
Schitt, and the twins: Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parent's objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb
Schitt, a high school drop out. However, after being married
15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later
remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were living with
them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known
as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a
son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two other of the
6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable
throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the
newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The
Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride,
Pisa Schitt. So now when someone says, "You don't know Jack
Schitt", you can correct them.
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