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IPL'S JOKES FOR THE DAY~
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life was, of course “perfect.”
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a SUV) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple they stopped to help.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.
Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.
Who was the survivor?
The perfect woman survived. She’s the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.
So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving. This explains why there was an accident.
_________________________________
THE DUMB BLONDE?~
There once was a blonde, a brunette and a red head and they were stranded in
the desert and there car broke down and they all decided to take one item with
them so the burnet took her cell phone just incase she got a signal some where
she could call for help the red head took her canteen of water the blond took
the car door after walking for 3 hours the blonde said oh yah i for got i
carried this door the whole time and forgot to roll down the window no wonder i
have been so hot
__________________________
The Dean of Women at an exclusive girls' school was lecturing her students on
sexual morality. "We live today in very difficult times for young people. In
moments of temptation," she said, "ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of
pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?"
A young woman rose in the back of the room and said, "Excuse me, but how do
you make it last an hour?"
______________________________
THE 80 YEAR OLD VIRGIN~
There is an 80 year old virgin who suddenly gets an itch in her crotch area.
She goes to the doctor who checks her out and tells her she has crabs. She
explained that she couldn't have crabs because she was a virgin, but the doctor
didn't believe her, so she went to get a second opinion.
The second doctor gave her the same answer. So she went to a third doctor and
said "Please help me. This itch is killing me and I know that I don't have crabs
because I'm a virgin".
The doctor checks her out and says "I have good news and bad news. The good
news is you don't have crabs, the bad news is that your cherry rotted and you
have fruit flies."
Stay Strong~~!!!
IPL
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car (a SUV) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple they stopped to help.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.
Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.
Who was the survivor?
The perfect woman survived. She’s the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.
So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving. This explains why there was an accident.
_________________________________
THE DUMB BLONDE?~
There once was a blonde, a brunette and a red head and they were stranded in
the desert and there car broke down and they all decided to take one item with
them so the burnet took her cell phone just incase she got a signal some where
she could call for help the red head took her canteen of water the blond took
the car door after walking for 3 hours the blonde said oh yah i for got i
carried this door the whole time and forgot to roll down the window no wonder i
have been so hot
__________________________
The Dean of Women at an exclusive girls' school was lecturing her students on
sexual morality. "We live today in very difficult times for young people. In
moments of temptation," she said, "ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of
pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?"
A young woman rose in the back of the room and said, "Excuse me, but how do
you make it last an hour?"
______________________________
THE 80 YEAR OLD VIRGIN~
There is an 80 year old virgin who suddenly gets an itch in her crotch area.
She goes to the doctor who checks her out and tells her she has crabs. She
explained that she couldn't have crabs because she was a virgin, but the doctor
didn't believe her, so she went to get a second opinion.
The second doctor gave her the same answer. So she went to a third doctor and
said "Please help me. This itch is killing me and I know that I don't have crabs
because I'm a virgin".
The doctor checks her out and says "I have good news and bad news. The good
news is you don't have crabs, the bad news is that your cherry rotted and you
have fruit flies."
Stay Strong~~!!!
IPL
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