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So today I was driving home from another long day at work. I saw the golden arches ahead and decided that I required a McFlurry because I had not fulfilled my daily requirement of ice cream. I stop in to McD's and purchase a McFlurry.
So I'm driving along, eating my Butterfinger McFlurry and listening to my radio. I am on cloud nine, feeling like a million bucks because I have ice cream to eat. I am convinced that life can't get any better(I'm a simple guy, it doesn't take much to make my day).So as I eat my cup of frozen deliciousness, I savor every spoonful of it, without taking for granted a single taste. It is like a little piece of heaven in my mouth.
Anyways, my mind wanders, as it usually does, and I start asking myself questions....
Mind: How much do you really like ice cream?
Me: A lot... It is the best shit ever.
Mind: If you could live on nothing but ice cream would you do it?
Me: **** yeah.
Mind: If you had to choose between sex and ice cream which would you choose?
Me: What? Don't think like that ****ing mind. That's ****ed up, I hate you.
Mind: Answer the ****ing question *****.
Me: Well, do you mean choose one or the other as a one time thing or like choose one or the other forever?
Mind: Hmmm, I didn't think of that. Answer both and explain.
Me: Well, it does sadden me to even think that I would have to do with out one or the other but if it was forever I think I would have to choose sex. Ice cream is good but there is nothing like a good ****ing to make a guy's day. Plus, I could probably drink beer to curve my ice cream cravings.
Mind: Yeah, I'll give you that. Decent answer and nice touch with the use of beer. Touche.
Now answer the other question.
Me: Ok, if it was a one time deal I would.... well.... time out. Give me a minute.
( a minute goes by as I think about this horrible dilemna)
Mind: Ok Stacks, your minute is up. ****ing answer the question.
Me: Alright, I'm going to have to choose ice cream if it was a one time deal. I can always get laid tomorrow and if not I guees I can beat it up to internet porn. But ya know, damn it, when I guy wants ice cream right ****ing now, he has to have ice cream right ****ing now. Not tomorrow, not later, right ****ing now! Sex can wait an hour or so. Besides I choose ice cream over sex so I can still have it both ways. I can eat my ice cream and still get some. There are always blow jobs!
True story. The end.
So I'm driving along, eating my Butterfinger McFlurry and listening to my radio. I am on cloud nine, feeling like a million bucks because I have ice cream to eat. I am convinced that life can't get any better(I'm a simple guy, it doesn't take much to make my day).So as I eat my cup of frozen deliciousness, I savor every spoonful of it, without taking for granted a single taste. It is like a little piece of heaven in my mouth.
Anyways, my mind wanders, as it usually does, and I start asking myself questions....
Mind: How much do you really like ice cream?
Me: A lot... It is the best shit ever.
Mind: If you could live on nothing but ice cream would you do it?
Me: **** yeah.
Mind: If you had to choose between sex and ice cream which would you choose?
Me: What? Don't think like that ****ing mind. That's ****ed up, I hate you.
Mind: Answer the ****ing question *****.
Me: Well, do you mean choose one or the other as a one time thing or like choose one or the other forever?
Mind: Hmmm, I didn't think of that. Answer both and explain.
Me: Well, it does sadden me to even think that I would have to do with out one or the other but if it was forever I think I would have to choose sex. Ice cream is good but there is nothing like a good ****ing to make a guy's day. Plus, I could probably drink beer to curve my ice cream cravings.
Mind: Yeah, I'll give you that. Decent answer and nice touch with the use of beer. Touche.
Now answer the other question.
Me: Ok, if it was a one time deal I would.... well.... time out. Give me a minute.
( a minute goes by as I think about this horrible dilemna)
Mind: Ok Stacks, your minute is up. ****ing answer the question.
Me: Alright, I'm going to have to choose ice cream if it was a one time deal. I can always get laid tomorrow and if not I guees I can beat it up to internet porn. But ya know, damn it, when I guy wants ice cream right ****ing now, he has to have ice cream right ****ing now. Not tomorrow, not later, right ****ing now! Sex can wait an hour or so. Besides I choose ice cream over sex so I can still have it both ways. I can eat my ice cream and still get some. There are always blow jobs!
True story. The end.
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