I live in a closed gate community thats ran by a home owners association. This association has certain rules, one of them being a weed abatement rule. This rule requirs ALL members of the community to have their yards free of weeds/brush and trees trimmed to 6' above the ground by the fiirs of July every year or there will be a $500 fine and they will send out a crew to do it for you (wich is another $300). For the record, i have no problem with this rule.
I live on just over an acre and i let my backyard grow until the last rain and then i spend the day weed eating it and such. My front yard is lanscaped so there is minimal light duty work to be done. So, about a month back i get the little electric weed eater out to do the front yard. Thirty minutes later it starts smoking and is completey ruined. I'm like "well, no biggie i'll just finish it with the big weed eater" i get that one out finish off the front yard an then head over to the side yard where the tree like milk thistle plants are. ten minutes later that weed eater dies. Hmm, i check everything and its good, just that its not working and not starting...20 minutes and several attempts to get it started again pass and i get pissed and walk away.
The next weekend rolls around and i head to the nearest Home Depot (wich is an hour away from my bumfuck town) I buy myself a heavy duty industrial weed eater and one of those "cut through anything attachments". I get home and i'm like "yeah baby, bring it on..i'm going to kick your ass today!" This attachment is BAD ASS and i'm flying through the yard...Then the weed eater dies! i look at it and the entire spool/head is freaking melted! all thats left is the shaft and the bolt to the spool /head! WTF, this thing is brand spanking new!!!!! Now, at this point i'm really scratching my head and thinking that karma is laughing her fat ass off at me so i go back into the garage and try my other heavy duty weed eater again. I go to start it and it gives me signs that its going to. I'm like "hell yes!" i set choke to half and pull the cord and it fires up! OH HELL YES! i stand up, put the shoulder strap on and get about 10' from my garage and it dies....never to start again. I then calmy set it down and go inside...done for the day.
Weekend number three arrives and the due date is slowly closing in on me. I go and buy a new head/spool for weed eater #3, the brand new one. I go and get everything set up in the backyard and get the new spool on. The entire time i'm sending these really mean mental signals to this damn thing bc if it decides to not work i'm gong to kill it and kill something good! It fires up real nice and is destroying everything in its path and i feel like superman!!! this is freaking AWESOME! Then, just i set in for a long days work the freaking spool goes flying across the yard! So my first thought was that i didn't put it on right so its no big deal. I retrieve spool and go to put it back on. YEAH RIGHT, the entire bolt/shaft connection is totally fried!!! YES, yes i do feel like crying, so the fuck what! I'm looking at this thing in total disgust and wondering if i could return it after smashin it into bits and pieces, luckily for it my son calls me bc he neds help with something. I then go into the garage and see if theres anything i can do toi fix weed eater #2, i work on iy for about 20 minutes and it fires right up. let me tell you this, the sound of a weed eater has never made me feel so good! this is the machine that i like and now its running!!! WHOOOOOOOOO!!!! I qucky run through the house and down the stairs (with it running) bc i'm not taking ANY chances of it dying. I get outside and run over to the weeds and start ripping them to shreds ( God this feels so good!) then of course it dies bc i'm not paying attention and weeds have wrapped themselves around the shaft. I look at it and realize the problem and dont get too worked up over it bc its obviously not a mechanical problem. So i free the shaft of the weeds and and pull the ripcord thingy to start it...the damn thing comes clean out of the engine!!! I just sat there staring at it, trying to convince myself that it really didn't happen, hoping and praying that this is some bad dream and i will soon wake up. Then of course the warm wet tongue from my dog slaps me in the face and brings me back to my miserable reality.
I now have till thursday to complete my yard, its not even close to 1/4 done. I'm going back to home depot to exchange the one i bought..i'm thinking i'll buy something thats really expensive, so when it breaks i can really lose it and kill my neighbors or something....
Oh, just so that Karma knows she's getting the best of me, she placed a baby deer in the road Sat. night for me. I was coming around a corner and there it was, i swerved to miss it and lost control of my Mustang, slamming into the side of a mountain and wasting my car....
Its been a glorious month for me!
I live on just over an acre and i let my backyard grow until the last rain and then i spend the day weed eating it and such. My front yard is lanscaped so there is minimal light duty work to be done. So, about a month back i get the little electric weed eater out to do the front yard. Thirty minutes later it starts smoking and is completey ruined. I'm like "well, no biggie i'll just finish it with the big weed eater" i get that one out finish off the front yard an then head over to the side yard where the tree like milk thistle plants are. ten minutes later that weed eater dies. Hmm, i check everything and its good, just that its not working and not starting...20 minutes and several attempts to get it started again pass and i get pissed and walk away.
The next weekend rolls around and i head to the nearest Home Depot (wich is an hour away from my bumfuck town) I buy myself a heavy duty industrial weed eater and one of those "cut through anything attachments". I get home and i'm like "yeah baby, bring it on..i'm going to kick your ass today!" This attachment is BAD ASS and i'm flying through the yard...Then the weed eater dies! i look at it and the entire spool/head is freaking melted! all thats left is the shaft and the bolt to the spool /head! WTF, this thing is brand spanking new!!!!! Now, at this point i'm really scratching my head and thinking that karma is laughing her fat ass off at me so i go back into the garage and try my other heavy duty weed eater again. I go to start it and it gives me signs that its going to. I'm like "hell yes!" i set choke to half and pull the cord and it fires up! OH HELL YES! i stand up, put the shoulder strap on and get about 10' from my garage and it dies....never to start again. I then calmy set it down and go inside...done for the day.
Weekend number three arrives and the due date is slowly closing in on me. I go and buy a new head/spool for weed eater #3, the brand new one. I go and get everything set up in the backyard and get the new spool on. The entire time i'm sending these really mean mental signals to this damn thing bc if it decides to not work i'm gong to kill it and kill something good! It fires up real nice and is destroying everything in its path and i feel like superman!!! this is freaking AWESOME! Then, just i set in for a long days work the freaking spool goes flying across the yard! So my first thought was that i didn't put it on right so its no big deal. I retrieve spool and go to put it back on. YEAH RIGHT, the entire bolt/shaft connection is totally fried!!! YES, yes i do feel like crying, so the fuck what! I'm looking at this thing in total disgust and wondering if i could return it after smashin it into bits and pieces, luckily for it my son calls me bc he neds help with something. I then go into the garage and see if theres anything i can do toi fix weed eater #2, i work on iy for about 20 minutes and it fires right up. let me tell you this, the sound of a weed eater has never made me feel so good! this is the machine that i like and now its running!!! WHOOOOOOOOO!!!! I qucky run through the house and down the stairs (with it running) bc i'm not taking ANY chances of it dying. I get outside and run over to the weeds and start ripping them to shreds ( God this feels so good!) then of course it dies bc i'm not paying attention and weeds have wrapped themselves around the shaft. I look at it and realize the problem and dont get too worked up over it bc its obviously not a mechanical problem. So i free the shaft of the weeds and and pull the ripcord thingy to start it...the damn thing comes clean out of the engine!!! I just sat there staring at it, trying to convince myself that it really didn't happen, hoping and praying that this is some bad dream and i will soon wake up. Then of course the warm wet tongue from my dog slaps me in the face and brings me back to my miserable reality.
I now have till thursday to complete my yard, its not even close to 1/4 done. I'm going back to home depot to exchange the one i bought..i'm thinking i'll buy something thats really expensive, so when it breaks i can really lose it and kill my neighbors or something....
Oh, just so that Karma knows she's getting the best of me, she placed a baby deer in the road Sat. night for me. I was coming around a corner and there it was, i swerved to miss it and lost control of my Mustang, slamming into the side of a mountain and wasting my car....
Its been a glorious month for me!

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