4 Ways to Be a Better Dad

[BABY1]

TweetWant your kid to develop normally? Take a chill pill. Stress may affect the way your child’s brain develops, says a study published in the Journal of Neuroscience.
Researchers interviewed 61 children, ages 9 to 14, to assess the amount of stress exposure in their lives. The results: Brain scans showed that that a part of the brain believed to play a key role in working memory was smallest in children exposed to the most stress.

No stress here!

When a child’s nervous system is overstimulated by stress, cognitive growth suffers because their minds are not fully developed yet, says Lawrence Balter, Ph.D., a family psychologist and author of Not in Front of the Children.
Check out the following four moves that every man should make to safeguard your home—and your kids—from stress.


Argue On Your Own Time
Fighting in front of the kids should happen rarely, if ever. “Kids look to parents as the protectors,” says Balter. “So any time they witness their parents screaming, throwing, or slamming things—or just angry at each other in general—it’s going to frighten them.” So what happens if they walk in on you? Play it cool. Don’t pretend you’re not arguing, but don’t give them every gory detail either. “Just give them some clue about the nature of the disagreement, and once it’s settled, always make sure to let them know the issue has been resolved,” says Balter.
Act Your Age
If you and your wife are in a dispute, never involve your child by unloading your problems on them. Confiding in your child not only stresses your kid out, it makes him feel guilty because he also feels loyal to his mom, says Balter. Instead, take out your frustrations with someone your own age—like your closest buds or a family member, Balter suggests.



Lead by Example
Make your house a smoke-free zone and avoid drinking in front of them, says Balter. Although this isn’t true for everyhousehold, excessive drinking often leads to conflict. So if you can keep these vices out of the picture, not only will you eliminate potential trouble, you’ll be setting a healthy example for them to follow, says Balter.


Discipline, Don’t Criticize
“The research shows that if you’re extremely controlling and negative, it’s going to backfire on you,” says Balter. Yelling and blaming kids when things go wrong only adds stress and keeps them from coming to you with their problems or slip-ups in the future. Your move? Change your approach. If they do something that is out of line, reprimand them. But let them have some say to defend or explain what happened, says Balter. Then explain to them why their actions were wrong, and break down why there have to be consequences.

[exphys88]

TweetThanks for this. Parenting is the most difficult, and most important thing I've ever done.