Dr. Phil's Advice for inner peace

[kite]

TweetBy following the simple advice I heard on a Dr. Phil show, I have finally
found inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed that the way to achieve inner peace
is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to
see things I started and hadn't finished; and, before leaving the house this
morning I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of White Zinfandel, a
bottle of Baileys, a bottle of Kahlua, a package of Oreos, the remainder of
both Prozac and Valium prescriptions, the rest of the cheesecake, some
saltines and a box of chocolates.

You have no idea how freaking good I feel.

[space mountain]

Tweetlmfao that was good!

[supasaiyan99]

TweetOreos!!!! Yummy!!!!