Here is a list of terms for all the things you do and never knew the
name
>for.
>
>
>1. Tea bag - As you are sitting on a girl's face, repeatedly dip your
>scrotum in and out of her mouth, similar to a tea bag in a cup of hot
>water.
>An old favorite.
>
>2. Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you shit on her
chest.
>(a. k. a. the Cleveland Steamer)
>
>3. The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then
>jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.
>
>4. Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before
you
>cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the back
of
>the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work
correctly,
>the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up.
>
>5. Golden Shower - Any form of peeing on a girl. (aka: watersports)
>
>6. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever you cum on the neck/cleavage
area
>of a girl, it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry.
>
>7. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty skank
and
>you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that
your
>arm is wrapped around her. Therefore, you must gnaw off your own arm to
get
>out of this situation. Can be very painful.
>
>8. Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex
and
>you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It
should
>leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.
>
>9. The Flying Camel - A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back
and
>you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself
>without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then to flap your arms
and
>let out a long, shrieking howl. Strictly a class move.
>
>10. Double Fishhook - From the doggy-style position, you hook your
pinky
>fingers in her mouth and pull back to achieve deeper penetration.
>
>11. The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start
ramming
>her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall
>should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in
penile
>sensitivity.
>
>12. Dog in a Bathtub - This is the proper name for when you attempt to
>insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can be
just
>as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.
>
>13. The Bronco - Back to reality with this classic. You start by going
>doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab onto
her
>tits as tightly as possible and yell another girl's name. This gives
you
>the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off.
>
>14. Pink Glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not
wet
>enough. When you pull out to give her the money, the inside of her twat
>sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove.
>
>15. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat
your
>ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible
before
>releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and
>tits.
>(Better in her bed)
>
>16. New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk that when you
go
>down on her, you puke on her box.
>Happy trails!
>
>17. Dirty Sanchez - While banging a girl doggy style, quickly stick 2
>fingers deep into her starfish, then reach around and wipe the residue
on
>her upper lip, providing her a mustache.
>
>18. Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that
your
>thumb is facing towards you. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use;
>hence, western.
>
>19. The Blumpkin - You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It
>involves having her suck you off while you're on the shitter.
>
>20. The Bismark - Another one involving oral sex. Right before you are
>about to spew, pull out and shoot all over her face. Follow that with a
>punch and smear the blood and jism together.
>
>21. Jelly Doughnut - A derivation of the Bismark. All you have to do is
>punch her in the nose while you are getting head.
>
>22. Woody Woodpecker - While a chick is sucking on your balls,
repeatedly
>tap the head of your **** on her forehead.
>
>23. Tossing salad - Well known by now. A prison act where one person is
>forced to chow starfish with the help of whatever condiments are
available,
>i. e. Jello, jism, etc
>24. The Fish Eye - Working from behind, you shove your finger in her
>pooper.
>Thereupon, she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what
the
>hell you are doing.
>
>25. Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick, lapping away, and you discover
that
>it's her time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the
whale
>spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
>
>26. The Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty Zena who has a
mane
>between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, when a mammoth fur
ball
>gets lodged in your throat. You punch her.
>
>27. The Chili Dog - You take a dump on the girl's chest and then titty
****
>her.
>
>28. Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is
for
>wimps. Make this famous knuckle-ball pitcher proud and use multiple
digits
>on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of 2 knuckles required (either on
one
>finger or on multiple).
>
>29. The Rear Admiral - An absolute blast. When getting a chick from
behind
>(with both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab onto
>anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside
so
>that the momentum pushes her forward. The goal is to push her into a
wall
>or table, or have her trip and fall on her face. You attain the status
of
>Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into
>anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
>
>30. Glass Bottom Boat - Putting saran wrap over the skank's face and
taking
>a dump.
>
>31. Ray Bans - Put your nuts over her eye sockets while getting head.
>You're can is on her forehead. Yes, it may be anatomically impossible,
but
>it is definitely worth a try.
>
>32. The Snowmobile - When plugging a girl while she's on all fours,
reach
>around and sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
>
>33. The Dutch Oven - Also well known. Whenever you fart while humping,
pull
>the covers over her head. Don't let her out until all movement ceases.
>
>34. Smoking Pole - Self Explanatory. Don't use fire.
>
>35. Rusty Trombone - Getting the reacharound while getting your salad
>tossed. Also known as milking the prostate.
>
>36. Turkey Shoot - When you're coming, come on her face and let it drip
off
>her chin so it looks like that red shit on the turkey's chin.
>
>37. Stovepiping - Taking it in the Tush.
>
>38. Rusty Anchor - After a healthy term of the Stovepiping, the
recipient
>gets to enjoy a good fudgesicle.
>
>39. Sandpiper - A stovepiping on the local beach, desert, or playground
>sandbox. Also known as the Sandblast.
>
>40. Lucky Pierre - the middle man in a three way butt****. Also known
as
>the french sandwich.
>
>41. Divortex- A mystical place into which old friends are sucked when a
>married couple splits up.
>
>42. Blump- To suck someone's dick while they are taking a dump.
>
>43. Bustard- A very rude bus driver.
>
>44. Cold Faithful- Blowing your visibly-steaming load outside in the
>winter-time, like when you get your **** sucked on a ski-lift.
>
>45. Grand pappy smash- To beat your meat so hardcore that it starts to
>chafe and bleed.
>
>46. Esplanade- To attempt an explanation while drunk.
>
>47. Flatulence- The emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are
run
>over by a steamroller.
>
>48. Butt Rodeo- When you're going at it with a girl, you flip her over
real
>fast, start ramming her in the ass and yell as loud as possible "BUTT
>RODEO!" You then see how long you can ride her till she tosses ya off!
>
>49. Bargoyle- The hideous old hair-spray hag who seems to live at your
>local watering hole. She usually smokes endlessly, spends hundreds of
>dollars a night on video-poker, and makes sexually threatening comments
to
>frightened college freshmen.
>
>50. Pasteurize- Once you get her hairy bush pasteurize, you got it
licked!
>
>51. Beerelevant- A point which does not seem to be particularly
important,
>given enough beer
>52. Mangry- Describing the anger of women who are angry at men,
>specifically.
>"She's such a *****, she's just plain mangry. "
>
>53. Clitourist- A man who won't stop and ask for directions in bed. ie:
>"Because of his fouled foreplay, Suzy realized that her new boyfriend
was
>no experienced bedroom traveler, but merely a clitourist. "
>
>54. Stuf****ing- The act of "stuffing in" your limp, helpless member in
>hopes of getting it up. Potential causes: you're too drunk or she's too
>ugly. (see also; Fugly)
>
>55. Antlers- Wide, flat, flapjack titties that come to a sharp point at
the
>nipples.
>
>56. The Kangmin - while a girl is reciting bad poetry, you take her
from
>behind.
>
>57. The Flaming Amazon- This one's for all you pyromaniacs out there.
When
>you're screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, pull out and
>quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then
extinguish
>the flames with your jizz!
>
>58. The Screwnicorn -When a dyke puts her strap-on dildo on her
forehead
>and proceeds to go at her partner like a crazed unicorn.
>
>59. Split pissonality -When you're taking a leak and you get two
streams
>out of the one hole!
>
>60. A Short in the Cord- A "code" phrase used by the common man to
refer to
>Testicular Tendon Tangle Syndrome.
>Ex. "Oh ****! My nuts are killing me. . .
>I think I've got a short in the cord. "
>
>61. Old Jism Trail -The stream of semen oozing down the chin and chest
of
>someone who has just finished fellating a senior citizen.
>
>62. Abdicate -To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
>
>63. Lymph -To walk with a lisp.
>
>64. Anal Boot- An anal boot is when you take a pitcher of beer,
everyone
>spits in it, someone stirs it with their **** and then the mixture is
>poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the
loser
>of a bet or drinking game.
>
>65. Australian Death Grip- The act of grabbing a woman by the
>haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped
or
>kissed. A recommended tactic for very crowded bars. Another great
>opportunity for wagering among friends.
>
>66. Fumilingus -When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman
and
>she farts directly in his/her face.
>
>67. Intoxicourse- Having sexual intercourse whilst piss-drunk.
>
>68. Valsalva -The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a
>woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed
just
>prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow
that
>the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first date
ploy,
>as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be going
>forward.
>
>69. Insta-gasm -Pre-mature ejaculation at the sight of a beautiful
woman.
>ie: "She was so fine, I had an insta-gasm before I could get her
clothes
>off!"
>
>70. Manual Deconstipation -This is where you get out the hand cream and
go
>in manually for the hammerhead by breaking it into smaller chunks and
>pulling it out a piece at a time.
>
>71. Post Poodum Syndrome -The feeling of depression felt after
successful
>removal of a hammerhead. The excitement has passed, and you must now
find
>something else to occupy your time.
>
>72. The Homolic Maneuver -Using your penis to dislodge an object
blocking a
>choking victim's windpipe.
>
>73. Pegging - having a female take you in the rear with a strap on.
>
>74. The UnderDog - after a hard session at the gym, your armpit muscle
>begins to twitch; thus giving you the ability to jerk a guy off with
your
>armpit muscle.
>
>75. The Twinkler - when you are 69ing a girl and you shove your dick
into
>mouth hard, and you watch her a-hole "twinkle" as she gags.
>
>76. Angry dragon - This involves the girl giving the guy head and as he
is
>about to cum slapping the girl on the back of the head causing the cum
to
>come out her nose. Great care should be used to not slap her mouth
shut.
>
>77. Tony Danza - a takeoff of the donkey punch is called the Tony
Danza.
>When you are about to cum while doing a girl from behind, you say
"who's
>the boss?" and stick it in her ass.
>Before she says anything you shout "TONY DANZA!" and punch her in the
back
>of the head.
>
>78. Alaskan firedragon - another good take off is one of the angry
dragon
>that is called the alaskan firedragon. When a girl is giving you a
blowjob,
>cum in her mouth unexpectedly and plug up her mouth at the same time.
Then
>whisper in her ear "i have syphilis" so she spews it out her nose.
>
>79. The Walrus - when she's giving u a blowjob and u cum in her mouth
>unexpectadly, cover up her mouth and punch her in the stomach.
>
>80. The Fat Lip - If you get poison ivy and finger a girl, her labia
lips
>will swell. A la, the fat lip.