The Most Offensive World Records...Don't worry, not so bad;)

[Hollywood]

TweetTHE MOST OFFENSIVE WORLD RECORDS!!


MOST SEMEN SWALLOWED

Michelle Monahan had 1.7 pints of semen pumped out of her stomach in Los Angeles in July 1991.



LONGEST PUBES

Maoni Vi of Cape Town has hair measuring 32 inches from the armpits and 28 inches from her vagina.



MOST CAVERNOUS CROTCH

Linda Manning of Los Angeles could, without preparation, completely insert a lubricated American football into her vagina.



ZITS

In July 1987, Carl Chadwick of Rugby, England, squeezed a zit and projected a detectable amount of yellow pus a distance of 7ft 1inch.



WORST DRINK

The most horrible drink to be considered a beverage and safely drunk is Khoona. It is drunk by Afghani tribesmen ontheir wedding night and consists of a small amount of still-warm very recently attained bull semen. It is believed to be a potent aphrodisiac.



MOST OFFENSIVE COCKTAIL

This is available from a few select bars in New York. It contains tomato juice, a double shot of vodka, a spoonful of French mustard and a dash of lime. It is not mixed,but served with a tampon(unused) instead of a cocktail umbrella and is known as a '**** Pump'.



GREATEST DISTANCE ATTAINED FOR A JET OF SEMEN

Horst Schultz achieved 18 ft 9 in with a 'substantial' amount of seminal fluid. He also hold the records for the greatest height (12 ft 4in) and the greatest speed of ejaculation, or muzzle velocity, with 42.7mph.



LONGEST TURD

The longest dump ever verified was produced by an American who, produced a 'staggering turd' over a period of 2 hr 12 mins which was officially measured at 12 ft 2in. The offender is banned from 134 washrooms in his state.



MOST PROLONGED FART

Bernard Clemmens of London managed to sustain a fart for an officially recorded time of 2 mins 42 seconds

[Auriflex]

TweetHonestly - I just had breakfast.

[Morgan]

TweetHollywood - Too funny/gross. The football one is hysterical. Can you imagine? Maybe she should play center for one of the pro teams.

[BouncersBabe]

TweetLMAO! Ewwwww...........but funny!

[Speedracer59]

TweetA 12 foot turd? Holy shit (no pun intended). You would have to walk with that one. That had to be terrible. Imagine cooking a turd for that long.

[Hollywood]

TweetHahahahaha! Hope you guys are enjoying your "protein" shakes

[unbreakable]

TweetThat is some sick shit.

[3Vandoo]

TweetI witnessed the worst drink.......


poor dude, he drank that before his honeymoon night


heheheheheheeeeeeee

[Speedracer59]

TweetYou left out the worlds grossest thread.

https://www.fitnessgeared.com/forum/s...threadid=11255

[Hollywood]

Tweet

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
I dont believe that one. Thats just like the rumor that rapper lil kim had cum pumped from her stomach. all semen is, is a small amount of amino acids and carbohydrates in a certain chain. why would anyone have to have it pumped from there stomach?

Always so technical and argumentative, arent ya babe?

[gongshow]

Tweetwow...sick shit...

[gongshow]

Tweetbut hilarious hahaha

[Hollywood]

Tweet

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
maybe:p

mmmmhmmm...

[morbid316]

Tweet[QUOTE]Originally posted by Hollywood
THE MOST OFFENSIVE WORLD RECORDS!!





LONGEST PUBES

Maoni Vi of Cape Town has hair measuring 32 inches from the armpits and 28 inches from her vagina.

i bet you she never got laid

MOST CAVERNOUS CROTCH

Linda Manning of Los Angeles could, without preparation, completely insert a lubricated American football into her vagina.

have this chick as QB she fakes handoff to RB the shoves ball up her snatch nobody would notice while she struts into the endzone and spikes the ball out of her *****

MOST OFFENSIVE COCKTAIL

This is available from a few select bars in New York. It contains tomato juice, a double shot of vodka, a spoonful of French mustard and a dash of lime. It is not mixed,but served with a tampon(unused) instead of a cocktail umbrella and is known as a '**** Pump'.

that is just plain gross

GREATEST DISTANCE ATTAINED FOR A JET OF SEMEN

Horst Schultz achieved 18 ft 9 in with a 'substantial' amount of seminal fluid. He also hold the records for the greatest height (12 ft 4in) and the greatest speed of ejaculation, or muzzle velocity, with 42.7mph.

damn i just got 18 ft 5 in
for height i got 12 ft

LONGEST TURD

The longest dump ever verified was produced by an American who, produced a 'staggering turd' over a period of 2 hr 12 mins which was officially measured at 12 ft 2in. The offender is banned from 134 washrooms in his state.

guys ass must of been sore from that one

MOST PROLONGED FART

Bernard Clemmens of London managed to sustain a fart for an officially recorded time of 2 mins 42 seconds

thats alot of gas build up

[Keiser]

Tweet

Originally posted by THE BOUNCER
I dont believe that one. Thats just like the rumor that rapper lil kim had cum pumped from her stomach. all semen is, is a small amount of amino acids and carbohydrates in a certain chain. why would anyone have to have it pumped from there stomach?

I always heard that it didn't digest? And how the hell do you know the exact chemistry of what semen is made up of? lol wait I don't wanna know....