MARS vs VEN US

[LOCO]

Tweetfrom cjm: MARS vs VEN US

I have never quite figured out why the sexual urges
of men & women differ so much, I never figured
out the whole Mars and Venus thing, why men think
with their head and women with their heart, how the
sexual desire gene gets thrown into a state of
turmoil when it hears the words "I do".

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting
into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, we
start touching, feeling and I am thinking tonight
is a green light!!!! Then out of nowhere she says,
"I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??"

So she says the words that I and every husband on
the planet dread. She explains that I must not be
in tune with her emotional needs as a woman. I'm
thinking, "What was her first clue?" I finally
realize that nothing is going to happen that
night, so I went to sleep.

The very next day we went shopping at a big unnamed
department store. I walked around while she tried
on three very expensive outfits. She couldn't
decide which one to take, so I told her to take all
three of them. She then tells me that she wants
matching shoes worth $200 each to which I say OK.
And then we go to the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a
set of diamond earrings. Let me tell you . . . she
was so excited. She must have thought that I was
one wave short of a shipwreck, but I don't think she
cared. I think she was testing me when she asked
for a tennis bracelet because she doesn't even play
tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I told her
that it was OK. She was almost sexually excited from
all of this and you should have seen her face when she
said, "I'm ready to go, let's go to the cash
register."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out,
"No, honey. I don't feel like buying all this stuff
now." You should have seen her face........it went
completely blank. I then said, "Really honey! I just
want you to HOLD this stuff for a while." And just
when she had this look like she was going to kill me,
I added; "You must not be in tune with my financial
needs as a Man."

I figure that I should be having sex again sometime
during the spring of 2005.

[Luftdude]

Tweetlmao good one

[3Vandoo]

TweetLMAO!!!!!!!!

HELL YEAH!

[jack hust]

Tweetlmaorof