Subject: Why they invented 'duct' tape
Subject: Why they invented 'duct' tape
> A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, "I
clocked you at 80 mile per hour, sir." The driver says,
"Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar
needs calibrating."
> > Not looking up from her knitting the wife says sweetly from the
passenger seat, "Now don't be silly, dear, you know that this car
doesn't have cruise control."
> >
> > As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his
wife and growls, "Can't you keep your mouth shut for once?"
> >
> > The wife smiles demurely and says, " You should be thankful your
radar detector went off when it did." As the officer makes out the
second ticket for the illegal radar dete! ctor unit, the man glowers
at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman,
can't you keep your mouth shut."
> >
> > The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing
your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine."
> >
> > The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but
took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license
out of my back pocket."
> >
> > The wife says," Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have
your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving."
> >
> > And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the
driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU SHUT
THE HELL UP??"
! > >
> > The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband
always talk to you this way, Ma'am?" (the killer line is next )
> >
> > "Oh, heavens no, officer. Only when he's been drinking."
