Twas da night befo' Crimmas, and all in da hood,
Not a homie was stirrin', cuz it waz all good.
The tube socks was hung on da window sill,
and we all had smiles up on our grills.

Mookie and Bebe was snug in da crib
in da back bedroom, cuz that's how we live.
And Moms in her doo-rag, and me wif my nine
had just gotten buzy cuz girlfriend is fine.

All of a sudden a lowrider rolled by,
Bumpin' phat beats cuz the system was fly.
I bounced to the window bout a quarter pas'
"Bout ready to pop a cap in somebody's ass.

We weren't even buggin,
no worries, no doubt.
Cuz bumpin' and thumpin' from around da way,
Was Santa, 8 reindeer, and a sleigh.

Da beats were thumpi', da ride was phat,
I Said "Yo Red Dawg, you all that!"
He threw up a sign, and yelled to his boys,
"Ay yo, give it up, let's make some noise!"

To the top of the projects and across the strip mall,
"We gots to go, I got a booty call".
He pulled up his ride to da top of da roof,
and sippin on a 40, he busted a move.

Iyelled up yo Santa,"Yo, ain't got no stack!"
He said, " Damn, homie. Deeze projects is whack.
But don't worry black, cuz I got da skillz,
I learnt way back when I hadda pay da billz."

Out of his bag, he pulled 3 small tings,
a credit card, a knife, and a bobby pin.
He slid down the fire escape as smooth as a cat,
and busted the window wif a basaball bat.

I said, "Damn Santa, whydya bust up my place?"
He said, "You best get up out my face!"
His thhreads was all leatha, his chains was all gold,
His sneaks was Puma and da was 5 years old.

He dropped down his duffle, Bulls logo on da side,
Santa broke out da loot and my mouf open wide.

A wink of da eye and shine off his gold toof,
He cabbage patched his way back up on da roof.
He jumped in his hooptie wif rims made of chrome,
To tap dat big booty waitin' at home.

Next year I be hopin',
A new Santa we get.
Cuz dis Santa Claus
Ain't worth a shit.