I was 12-13 years old. I played on a select soccer team. We were having a tourney and had a game off as we went to the next level of the bracket. There were guys and gals from many different teams milling about. We congregated at the backstop of the baseball diamond as we could climb it, dig our cleats in the links, relax and stay comfortably to watch the other teams play.

I was hanging on the chain link of the backstop and Richard Bergdorf jumped up and yanked my pants down to my ankles.......underwear and all!

So here I am hanging on the backstop 5 feet off the ground with my cleats stuck deeply in the links with my giblets on view at eye level for all to see. I try to jump back off the backstop but my feet stayed locked in by my cleats. I fell backwards and smacked my head on the clay. I was OUT COLD!

I woke up to a bunch of parents and kids surrounding me. My pants were up but my underwear was bunched up in them.

I was told later that I hung there in a scorpion position for a several minutes as kids laughed. (Some may have thrown dirt clods at my boy parts which were just sprouting my first glorious pubes) Finally a kid went and told an adult. They had to unlace my shoes and pull my feet out to get me down I was told. (Here is the thing, none of my team mates helped me)

Man, that sucked. My friends busted my chops so hard, but even worse was kids I did not even know knew me.......and BUSTED ME EVEN HARDER.

I have had migraines ever since then. My wife says I am dain bramaged.

So if you or your kids play soccer in Texas, there is a statewide rule, maybe a law, that prohibits climbing on the diamond backstops all because of me!