TweetJust a story about when you were so wrecked .... youtube vids welcome lol
TweetJust a story about when you were so wrecked .... youtube vids welcome lol
Tweetbad things.... so happy these camera phones werent around during my alcohol infused adventures.. even if i could remember the dumb shit ive done id be hard pressed to admit to it ..
TweetOh man, wrecked as in hammered drunk or wrecked as in physically diminished to the point one could not fight off a medium sized squirrel?
TweetI was never wrecked but the person among everyone else who was, lol. I have a lot of stories
Veritas Vos Liberabit
Tweetlet's just say the best stories i can't relay yet as the statute of limitations may not have run out on some of our shenanigans yet but a few funny how hammered were you moments was on the Chive yesterday and i related to more than a few of them like:
how wrecked were you?
i turned down mu tv because i couldn't taste my macaroni..... that wrecked.
a cop at the party i was at asked who had a gun. i was so wrecked i thought he said who had fun so i raised my hand.....that wrecked.
looked at myself in the mirror for 10 minutes so i could watch myself blink. i missed it every time, i was so pissed..... that wrecked.
once searched my room for a lighter for 20 minutes with the lights off using my lighter to see.....that wrecked.
smoked a bunch of weed with 4 friends. went to drive through but didn't feel like figuring out how to split the bill between us so we just went through the drive through 5 times. on the third time, the cashier asked us how high we were.... that high.
laughed at a fly buzzing around for an hour because i thought it sounded like a mini fart, and that's what was propelling him through the air..... that wrecked.
yeah.......
TweetI banged a chick who made roseanne barr look like Miss Universe
TweetWoke up in the middle of the broad River 30 miles from home 6 am with fishing pole no idea how I got there wife said I left home at 1 am wrecked
TweetTrue story-This was 20 years ago: I actually rear ended a car at a stoplight while I was drunk on my ass. In broad daylight. Then the state patrolman showed up and wrote me a ticket for following too close. Never asked if I was drinking. Then after I got my ticket, I plowed into the back 1/4 panel of his patrol car. I smashed it in good. He gets out and looks at his car all smashed, looks at me and says "Have you been drinking?" I said 'No not at all" He stands there, totally pissed off, shaking his head and then says "Just get the hell out of here". I drove away, completely obliterated. I still have no idea how I didnt get a dui that day. Just glad I dont drink anymore.
Tweetnow that's wrecked haha
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TweetThis post is embarrassing. I dished tmi.lol
Im just damn glad my drinking days are long gone. I could write a book about the dumb shit I did while drinking. Its a miracle it didnt kill me. Just grateful I lived through it to talk about it. I know a lot of people who didnt. Now I absolutely abhor alcohol. Once in a while I look back upon it, maybe for some sick humor ,lol but not very often.
Tweetyou and me both dzone. i never was a super big drinker but when i did i got shit housed hammered. i havent touched a drink in probably 10 years now maybe more
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TweetDamn dzone that is CRAZY!
We went to the dominican for our 20th. I had been drinking brew all day and was at the bar about 9pm. (wife was in our room as she had tummy troubles) The bartender said you need a mamajuana,I asked what that was so he set me up 5 glasses and poured them all full of this reddish liquid, the bottle appeared to have some kind of plants and pieces of wood in it. He told me it was an aphrodisiac and I would give it to my wife all night long. it also cured cancer and grew back hair (I am bald)
Enough said, I drank the first one. Tasted like kerosene and cough syrup with a hint of sweaty belly button lint.
Long and short of it. I drank the rest of the shots and half the bottle and then switched to scotch whiskey with a Scottish guy and his wife that happened to sit next to me at the bar.
Blackness overtook me but evidently I was still functioning on auto pilot.
woke the next morning, my wife was doing her hair and makeup. I was hung over! I was in my underwear on top of the bed spread hurting. My whole body was hurt and sticky and I could not hear very well and my nose was really stopped up.
Evidently I had taken off my shirt and pantsand started shoving the limes, cherrys and bar peanuts in my ears and nose.
Then I passed out in the corner. I was carried back to my room by the Scottish man the bartender and another employee. Wife tipped the guys $20 each (except the Scot) The bartender would ask me if I wanted a mamajuana every time he saw me. To this day, my stomach lurches at the mention of this name.
My lovely wife extricated the smashed cherries,lime and peanuts from my orifices with a flashlight a tweezers between my dry heaves.
TweetHad that cop asked me to step out of my car that day, I might have wobbled I was so annihilated on vodka. We had pulled off the street into a parking lot for him to write me a ticket and as I was pulling away I drove straight into the cop car. BAM!
He stood there, so pissed, I figured I was history and was going to jail. I can only assume he got called away on a case more serious than his smashed in cop car. I was shocked when he told me to just leave.