TweetMan I dont know what I could do to help, but if you need anything or just talk pm me.

It's hard when you have to be straight up with someone you care about like that. I've lost family and friends to alcohol and drugs, either from over doses. Or I've loaned them money and they wont answer my calls bc I guess they think I want it back, I just miss them and wish i could see them.

You have to let them know you care but that you wont put up with being run over either. Thats a hard balance to make. I dont really know what else to say brother but I will prat for you and your family.

TweetAh man im sorry you had to deal with that growing up, I cant relate but Im sure you guys had to deal with alot of chaos in that house. Im all about forgiveness but his actions are just terrible, i dont think i wouldve bailed him out, it sounds like hes just going back to drinking and being abusive to those around him.

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Originally Posted by hicktown

Ah man im sorry you had to deal with that growing up, I cant relate but Im sure you guys had to deal with alot of chaos in that house. Im all about forgiveness but his actions are just terrible, i dont think i wouldve bailed him out, it sounds like hes just going back to drinking and being abusive to those around him.

i understand your response and I felt and do feel the same way.. he has been like this his whole life. but I was not going to leave him in that jail. and after I left him and his wife I told my dad you want me in your life fine I will be there but if I come over here in 2 days or 2 months and I find beer or wine here I am done bc I know what its going to lead to and I will not put up with that in my life I don't need the drama not when it can be solved so simple by not drinking...

I am going to do some work at the house the wife and I are building it is a shell right now the ac man is installing the duct work so I am going over today and pick my dad up and take him by the house and spend a couple hours with him.. I talked with him last night at 8 and he seemed fine.. over all these years I can tell when he has been drinking and last night he wasn't..

my hope is to get him out of the house and doing things.. maybe give something to look forward to spending time with his son..thinking maybe next week take him to the muscle car museum instead of sitting at his house day and night with nothing to do but drink and smoke..

do I think its going to work? no I don't I am sure some where down the road he will drink.. but he's my dad I have to try.. the way he looks I don't see him being here in 5 years...

TweetYour a good guy for trying to help but if he doesn't see the problem and isn't willing to give 100% to change then the battle is lost. Hes got to want it. Im your age my father is heavy into the oxys and booze. Smokes a pack of non filtered camels a day and hes all about being a victim. I didnt grow up with him so the bond isn't strong I feel if thats what he wants and understands the consequences then its his to have.
for me hes an adult and understands his choices I wish him luck and allow him those choices. I stay out of his way and avoid helping him. i hope you can make a difference but only invest what he will invest otherwise you'll beat yourself up over things you cant control. Maybe im just an asshole for how I deal with my dad but I to have a life and am not willing to forfeited it to watch him citcle the drain by choice. Good luck