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Originally Posted by rocco-x

...but I still don't feel like I did in the past when coming back from a long layoff...
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You say you don't feel how you used to but how do you feel now after? What are your expectations this time around?

TweetI want to stay clean and sober, this time I'm putting my recovery 1st as, according to my friends I always got clean but turned the gym into my addiction.
I had a long layoff from the 90's unti 07 when I cleaned up last time and from day 1 I "tasted" the gym in every aspect...this time it's as if I've gotta force myself to go and push harder, not that pushing hard is a bad thing.

Just wondering if anyone "lost it" and if or how long did it take for the desire to come back.
My goals or expectations are to start schooling for my trainers cert/physical rehab and now possibly paramedic training via the NYFD. I just miss that drive, that desire or need to workout like I did in the past. No matter what the day brought me i was always stoked cause at the end of the day I knew the iron would calm me down at the days end.
It may be low test as severe opiate abuse hinders or stops natty test production. The tests, from what I hear, is expensive and not all Dr's do it so I may have to look into finding a clinic that will do testosterone level testings.
When I got clean in 07 I went on my "own trt" and felt insanely awesome. It wasn't until I came off my suboxone that I slowly stopped the gym and eventually relapsed in 2013. Coming up on 10mnths this week. I dunno...maybe I'm expecting too much too soon? Scared that the feeling will never come back...

TweetI hear, and understand ,what you are saying. For me, a LOT of positive self talk does help, but even that sometimes seems like not enough. Sounds like you have more set goals now, and doing what you need to taking care of yourself first. For me, I am learning to live in the moment... in the now. I think it is natural that when we try to stop something we look for something else to grasp onto, but hopefully that something else is a healthy coping strategy. I have learned that when we keep living in the past, or worrying about the future, we focus on what does not exist anymore or yet. There is no time that can be put on it. A couple things I repeat to myself constantly " I CAN do this" "I WANT to do this". Remember also that trying to be positive does not mean you wont have those sad, painful, or even negative feeling moments. Just remember it is what it is at the moment. Hang in there.

TweetThe best high I get is the two hrs after I hit the gym brother keep the faith

Tweetyou can get blood tests cheap. how come I cant think of the place now I don't know.. medx or something , some one here hopefully can chime in. its like 80 bucks

your head is prolly going back to the beginning .. set different goals, get a trainer for a short while, let the mirror be your motivation. goals are relative.. we all fall down and sometimes especially as we get older get tired of getting up .. motivation to me is always in the end that I will NOT end up like 90% of the people in my age group period.. no ifs ands or buts and failure is not an option.. now I fall off the wagon as I have done recently but that wasn't due to drugs or being lazy I took a job that was 6 months long and 10 to 12 hours a day.. money was my motivation.. now its back to the mirror for my motivation..

its all in how you feel in the end.

TweetBro , hit up Privatemedlabs !!! U can do a full panel , or what u want to test for dirt cheap . No doctors or assholes to go to and spill the beans !!!
It's been around 8-9 months since I came back frm a few months off and trust me , I'm not goin back . The first few weeks SUCKED !!!
I looked like a skinny fuck cheese when I hit the gym . Weak , Small , Sick looking , and I could feel the states of the people . Like look at this dude , he used to be big looking , now he lost it all . But I pushed thru and didn't care what people thought . That shit will always bring u down . Just think how ull look in 1 months time !!!
Are u on a cycle ? If so what are u taking ? All u need is a kickstart with some good Test P , some NPP , and throw in Dbol !!! It will all come back !!
I have those days where I don't even wanna go into the gym , but I sure am glad I push myself to goin !!!
Maybe take a partner with u ??? Ya can push eachother . Sometimes that's all the motivation u need !!

TweetKeep your head up brotha. I go through times when it takes every ounce of energy I have just to get to the gym. What always helps me is changing something up. Sometimes just going to a different gym, new faces and new equipment is all I need to get that hunger back. Anything to get my mind looking forward to hitting the gym. Set some new goals. You mentioned wanting to get your personal training cert, let that be your motivation for getting back to where you once were.

If you test levels are tanked, that could also be a factor in how you feel. Once you get that tested and treated if need be, it'll make a big difference in your drive. In the meantime, try to stay focused and stay positive. The body follows the mind. If you can keep your mind in a positive frame, your body will begin to follow.

TweetAge, Gear use/quality can make a different set of challenges. In short, so much info in our heads that nothing will probably seldom feel the same. I find it best to sometimes throw down the natural hammer for a solid week: Nutribullet shakes with lots of greens, forced naps/sleep and increased yoga mat time for both stretching but also mental focus. Most everything is in our head too btw! Last, get outside and change your scenery, routine for that week. Massive action will change your course.



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TweetILL TELL YOU THE BIGGEST MOTIVATOR IS HAVING A WORKOUT PARTNER ALMOST EQUAL TO YOURSELF...!
MY BUDDY AND I WERE JUST LIKE THAT AND IT WAS AWESOME!! WE KEPT EACH OTHER GOING! KEEP YOUR CHIN UP MAN!
I KNOW IT GETS TOUGH AND LIFE GETS IN THE WAY, BUT TRY TO KEEP ON TRACK!

O2